(11-10-10) I think it's a good thing I don't do Tech Support. Just spent 10 minutes trying to fix my internet connection. The cable was unplugged.
(02-20-09) I think you know times are tough when in the same week at work, your headphones are stolen from your desk and your Lean Cuisine is stolen from the fridge.
(03-19-08) I think there are times that I wish my main hobby wasn't the same thing that I do all day at work.
(09-21-07) I think you never hear anyone say things like "Friday afternoons are my most productive times".
(07-27-06) I think that when history looks back at what originally started World War III, it will be traced back to yesterday, when the Pepsi guy replaced one of the two Mountain Dew buttons in our machine at work with Sierra Mist. The resulting Mountain Dew outages will cause rioting here at the office, which will eventually spread.
(07-24-06) I think I have finally reached that point in my life where I have accepted the fact that there's no way for me to be an expert about all areas of computers, and I'm okay with that.
(06-05-06) I think if someone could talk my boss into giving me a few days off to work on my website redesign, I'd really appreciate it.
(01-30-06) I think that if I'm going to retire by age 30, I'd better get moving...
(01-18-06) I think it's no fun to drive to work when it's pitch black outside, and then drive home from work in the pitch black again. Talk about sucking the life out of me...
(12-27-05) I think a nice, carefully-worded Out of Office email message isn't worth a whole lot when you forget to turn it on before you leave for vacation.
(12-08-05) I think I liked Dilbert a lot more when it was just a funny cartoon instead of an accurate depiction of my daily life.
(08-22-05) I think when it's 90 degrees outside and the air conditioner in your office building is broken, you should get to go home early.
(06-14-05) I think when your program just won't compile, and the error is that MONTHTO is an invalid expression, and you know you defined it up in your parameter list, you should probably check and make sure you didn't define MONTHFO instead.
(05-18-05) I think putting me up in a hotel that's connected to both an Orange Julius and a Dairy Queen is not a good idea.
(05-18-05) I think I was about to write a new A Few Things entry about my convention in Atlanta, but then I realized it would be pretty much exactly the same as my entry for my trip to Orlando. You can see it here.
(05-16-05) I think it's only Monday at 9:12 AM, and I already want to go home from this conference in Atlanta. Come to think of it, I wanted to go home about the time I got here last night...
(02-25-05) I think it really bothers me that I have three different kinds of hand moisturizer in my desk at work.
(02-25-05) I think when you're in meetings, it's always a good idea to say things like "I don't have a dog in this fight", "We need to work smarter, not harder", or "The bottom line is..." so that people will think you're management material.
(02-11-05) I think I should point out that I have been a part of the working world for 4.5 years, and I have yet to calculate a single derivative or use anything else from any of the five calculus classes I took in college.
(01-10-05) I think I have finally reached that point in my life where I have more dress socks than white socks. Ick...I'm getting old.
(12-27-04) I think the squirrels outside my window at work have shoddy workmanship. They keep trying to build nests, and those nests keep falling down.
(12-27-04) I think the snooze button is a dangerous thing on the Monday after Christmas.
(11-19-04) I think the easiest way to prevent people from stealing your drinks out of the refrigerator at work is to bring drinks that no one else likes.
(07-16-04) I think a coworker of mine ate 12 fortune cookies at lunch, and now I'm frightened.
(06-30-04) I think the sweetest words you ever hear the voicemail lady at work say are "Your mailbox is empty".
(06-25-04) I think I refuse to ever use the word "memorandum" at work. I have my principles.
(12-05-03) I think the times of year where you eat candy all day at work are the best.
(11-17-03) I think this is the time of year that I don't get any work done because I'm too busy day-dreaming about Thanksgiving and Christmas.
(11-10-03) I think I wonder if anyone has ever said on Monday, "Wow, that weekend sure did seem too long..."
(10-27-03) I think when you put your mind to it, it's amazing how long you can sit at a desk and look busy without actually doing anything productive.
(10-02-03) I think it's funny, now that everyone in my office has matching company cell phones, whenever one of them rings and everybody tries to figure out whose phone it is (lousy Nextels don't have different ringtones).
(09-02-03) I think working for 11.5 hours is very tiring.
(08-14-03) I think I don't like it when people at work break my rule about talking to me before 9 AM.
(07-09-03) I think some people have a sixth sense (or maybe a radar) that tells them when a box of Krispy Kremes has entered the building.
(05-15-03) I think I like to think that I've grown as a person over the last couple of years, but as hard as I try, I just can't take anyone who sends emails in all-caps seriously. It's kind of like Northerners who think you're stupid just because you have a Southern accent. I just can't get past it.
(03-13-03) I think sometimes it's fun to say things like "I'm sorry, I can't afford to talk to you" to consultants.
(03-03-03) I think a sure sign of a micro-manager is when he or she constantly says that he or she doesn't want to be a micro-manager.
(02-26-03) I think we had a serious emergency at work on Tuesday...the Pepsi machine completely ran out of Mountain Dew, in both slots. Fortunately, the guy who refills it comes on Tuesday afternoons, but it was a scary couple of hours there.
(02-18-03) I think when working women get married, they don't think about how much work they cause their computer support staff when they change their name.
(01-31-03) I think the only difference between waiting until the last minute to do things in college and waiting until the last minute to do things in the real world is that in college, you seem to always pull it off.
(01-24-03) I think the fact that I'm going to Minneapolis and won't be seeing a Vikings game really stinks.
(01-21-03) I think it's so cool to finally have a real desk at home! The six-foot plastic table from Sam's served me well, I must say, but this is pretty sweet. Although I must admit, I discovered that they sell cubicle walls at Office Max, and the temptation to make myself a little cubicle here in our extra bedroom was there...
(01-14-03) I think some people don't find things like "Oops, I must've deleted your user ID" as funny as I do.
(01-13-03) I think if I set my watch and the clock in my car back 10 minutes, I wouldn't ever be late for work.
(12-30-02) I think it's amazing how entertaining squirrels can be when you're supposed to be working.
(12-30-02) I think it's nice to have a cubicle by a window. I can see the interstate! Talk about entertainment!
(12-26-02) I think I did so much work around the house on my vacation day today that I'm more tired than I would be if I had gone in to work.
(12-20-02) I think my cubicle looks really weird with all of the papers and pictures and Dilbert cartoons taken down.
(12-18-02) I think you just can't imagine how much I'm looking forward to my time off next week. And then the next week I'm moving to a cubicle next to a window! I've hit the big leagues now! Could life get any better?
(11-22-02) I think I need to work the sentence "It's the programmer's equivalent of the waiter spitting in your food" into a conversation at work sometime.
(10-27-02) I think I can't use any of the algorithms I learned in college in my job, because neither COBOL nor RPG allow recursion. I also think that only Brandon has any idea what that means.
(10-15-02) I think it's really nice how holidays and vacation days always seem to come at just the right time, when you need them the most.
(10-09-02) I think if I had worked in an office back in the days of dot-matrix printers, I would have gone crazy from the noise.
(09-24-02) I think I had forgotten how boring business trips are. Alpharetta, GA just isn't the most happening place in the world.
(08-28-02) I think I'm not at all interested in working these next three days before the start of Alabama football and the three-day weekend.
(08-22-02) I think mornings at work are much more bearable when you're excited about what you're going to have for lunch.
(08-15-02) I think my life is officially over now...one of the co-ops at work addressed me as "Mr. Eanes".
(08-14-02) I think someone finally threw out the sushi that had been in the refrigerator at work for several months.
(08-07-02) I think that either I'm shrinking, or someone is lowering my chair at work each night.
(06-27-02) I think that with all of the food and drinks I have stashed in my cabinet at work, it looks like I'm preparing for Y2K...
(06-24-02) I think a lot of people drink coffee in the morning at work so that they can wake up. My question is, why wake up?
(05-23-02) I think the day before a three-day weekend rules, at least as much as a work day can rule.
(05-23-02) I think egotistical technology primma donnas are entertaining to make fun of. And better yet, none of them actually work here...they're all vendors or contractors.
(05-16-02) I think people at work should understand that the more times you call me asking about the status of your project, the less time I actually have to spend on it. And if you manage to ask enough times to annoy me, it just might not get done at all.
(05-07-02) I think it's a special moment in a man's life when he finally gets his first program in a new language to compile. I had one of those today. Woohoo!
(04-29-02) I think everyone should only have to work a half-day on Mondays. Just to let us ease back into the swing of things.
(04-19-02) I think no amount of technical training can teach people to remember their passwords.
(04-18-02) I think it makes you feel not important when you're away from your desk for an hour, and when you come back you have no voice mails or e-mails.
(04-18-02) I think it's always kind of a surreal experience when they open company-wide meetings with prayer.
(04-16-02) I think it's funny how guys and girls are different. I'm pretty sure I've never gotten dressed for work, then changed my mind about what I was going to wear and put on something different, with the possible exception of a temperature-related change of shirts.
(04-10-02) I think I want to work "You idiot! This is single-sided paper!" into the punchline of a joke somehow.
(04-04-02) I think it's funny when you spend hours at work making a document, concentrating on getting all of the information correct, and the one thing the high-ups notice is that they don't like the way you formatted it.
(03-28-02) I think the biggest problem with working hard is that it generally gives you more work. If people think you have no idea how to do anything, they'll never ask you for help...
(03-24-02) I think weekends aren't nearly long enough, especially at this time of the year.
(03-21-02) I think that when your department has a backlog of over 2 years, it wouldn't set us back too much to give me a spring break.
(03-18-02) I think this might be a good time to once again harp on the fact that working people need a Spring Break too!
(03-04-02) I think there is no task so simple that it can't be made complicated by office politics.
(03-01-02) I think I should start using phrases like "resource allocation" to sound important.
(02-21-02) I think we should all congratulate Tammy on her first day at her new temp job!
(02-15-02) I think it'd be fun if offices would officially recognize Opposite Day. Wait, maybe I should say that they shouldn't recognize Opposite Day...or would I say that they should recognize Non-Opposite Day...now I'm all confused.
(02-08-02) I think I may have finally been sucked into the business world...last night, I was telling Tammy about my day, and several times I had to re-explain what I had said...not because of the technical jargon (I'm used to having to clarify that with most people), but because of the BUSINESS jargon I was using. Ack!
(01-31-02) I think I always get excited when the conference room accepts my invitation to a meeting.
(01-31-02) I think in the business world, it's not how much work you do or how good that work is, as much as it's whether or not your work shows up on reports to management.
(01-24-02) I think it's funny that our cafeteria at work sells Orange Ade. What are we, 7?
(01-04-02) I think it's sad that so many people work at jobs that they hate. Regardless of anything I say, I by no means hate my job. I just hate having to get up at 7 AM to do it.
(12-31-01) I think people who aren't here, by definition, can't call in with problems, so I shouldn't have to be at work today.
(12-31-01) I think everyone will be relieved after today because I'll stop whining about having to work when no one else has to.
(12-26-01) I think that since lots of people who aren't Christians get Christmas off as a holiday, I should get today off for Kwanzaa.
(12-26-01) I think having to work the day after Christmas is one of the other greatest tortures one has to endure.
(12-21-01) I think the last day of work before Christmas is one of the greatest tortures one has to endure.
(12-07-01) I think I'd make millions for developing an "executive slingshot" for shooting paper balls across the office.
(11-30-01) I think it's probably pretty sad that I'm so impatient with the printer at work that I often pull on the paper as it's coming out, as if that makes it hurry up or something. And this is a laser printer, which is tons faster than the dot matrix printers I grew up on.
(11-29-01) I think I need to start getting more business junk mail at work so I look important.
(11-29-01) I think the dumbest programming mistake I've ever made was about a year ago. To get the number of the previous month, I made my program just subtract 1 from the current month. Gee, I wonder whose program crashed the first time it ran in January?
(11-26-01) I think whenever people call me with problems at work, I'm going to pretend I don't speak English. Let's see how long I can keep it going.
(11-21-01) I think that when I oversleep by 35 minutes but still take a shower and get to work 10 minutes early, it says something about my normal morning routine. And the traffic the day before Thanksgiving.
(11-14-01) I think it's amazing how long people can keep jobs that they have no idea how to do.
(11-12-01) I think the printer at work is set to only run out of paper when I'm printing.
(11-05-01) I think I am an official sponsor of "Syntax Error Mondays".
(10-22-01) I think, in the business world, a useless document or report that looks pretty is usually better than useful report or document that looks boring.
(10-03-01) I think my filing cabinet is up to something. I just keep getting this feeling that it's watching me, just waiting for the right chance...
(09-28-01) I think work is more boring when Brandon's not updating his website.
(09-24-01) I think Keith Jackson is teaching my class here in Atlanta. "Whoa, nelly...type in the PO number and press enter...that's a good job done by Ricky, from Al-a-bama..."
(08-17-01) I think only business people can say things like "as per our earlier conversation".
(08-09-01) I think people's programming requests would get finished a lot faster if they would send along a case of Mountain Dew with it...
(08-09-01) I think I still don't understand why the business world has to start so early in the morning. Would it really be so bad if it started at 10 or 11?
(08-08-01) I think it's not fair that women get time off for having a baby but no one gets squat for getting married. It's just as stressful, and you need time to unpack and get settled in. Forget maternity leave, we need matrimonial leave!
(07-19-01) I think it's really funny when people call a co-op and make him come all the way over to our side of the floor to put paper into the printer. I think it's even funnier when I do it.
(07-09-01) I think business people think they're really cool when they write phone numbers with periods instead of hyphens. I just can't figure out why.
(07-03-01) I think it'd be really fun to work at the zoo for a few days, but after that it'd probably be just another smelly job.
(06-29-01) I think the IRS must be excited about today...it's my bonus payday, and they sure did get a big bonus...
(06-08-01) I think I should get a bonus on my paycheck for each time I hit someone with a paperball.
(06-08-01) I think I will never, ever be in any danger of becoming a workaholic. I'm way too lazy...
(06-04-01) I think the sentence "my cubicle is just a bathroom stall with a telephone" is really funny.
(06-04-01) I think I should just save everyone some trouble and start having my paychecks direct-deposited to Lowe's.
(06-01-01) I think people at work should get the hint that when I email them, it means I don't want to talk to them on the phone, unless I ended the email with "please call me", which has NEVER happened.
(05-16-01) I think 10 hour days give you the sensation of flying, as well as causing magical fairies to fly around your cubicle.
(05-10-01) I think it must have been cool to work back in the days before the telephone was invented. You could get your work done without being constantly interrupted, and people are much easier to deal with over e-mail.
(04-26-01) I think I should never be required to work consecutive days.
(04-25-01) I think it must've stunk back in the old days when people at work actually answered their phones instead of letting the voicemail get it.
(04-06-01) I think that when it's 80 degrees, sunny, spring time, and Friday afternoon, no one should have to work.
(04-06-01) I think the hardest thing about computer programming is protecting the user from his or her own stupid mistakes.