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That's it. My roommate just crossed the line from mere psycho to cartoonish super-psycho.
Forget the going to bed before 11 PM more than a few times a year. Forget the downing of two entire boxes of cereal or 8 bottles of Walmart's Free & Clear Water-flavored beverage in just a few days. Forget the cheese and Bacos sandwich. Forget the waking up at 4 AM to do homework. Never mind the getting out of bed three hours before he has to just because he woke up. Don't even mention the waiting almost an entire month to wash the dishes, or being the only male in the country who carefully examines the fat content of everything he eats. Forget the Pringle can shaking algorithm used to carefully choose cans with the least amount of broken chips. Never mind the wearing sweatpants in public.
This just blows it all away.
The man eats his sandwiches upside down!
As any warm-blooded mammal will tell you, sandwiches are made with the curvy side on top. That's how it comes in the package, and that's how the bread should stay. When eating the sandwich, one must be careful to keep this orientation or bad things will happen. Of course, this only applies to loaf-bread sandwiches...hamburgers or anything with circular bread doesn't matter. But it's just inherently wrong to turn a normal sandwhich upside down before eating. All good people take their first bites from the top (curvy side) and work their way down, not the other way around. What kind of an inhuman monster would upset the delicate balance of nature by eating a sandwich from the bottom up?
One 1122 co-conspirator of mine, Mr. Brandon German...that's who.
All threats, questions, and making-fun-ofs should be directed to him at brandon@1122productions.com. And please, keep him in yours prayers about this...